Gas

My subject for today is Gas. That is right! Gas!! Oh, oh, do I sound like a school teacher? Do not get me wrong teachers, teaching is a very noble and respectable career, and I applaud you for choosing the career that help shape the future leaders of our great country! Gosh! I am deviating from my subject. Okay, back to my topic, gas. I will not be talking about the gas that is for cars, but the gas that comes out from us. That is right! I will be talking about gas or fart! LOL. Fooled you, didn't I? Sorry, but I thought I will go for a lighter topic this time. I am not a subject matter expert on this topic, but I am sure there is at least one out there, because there is always a subject matter on anything. Don't you agree? Of, course! Why am I answering my own questions? Because there is no one beside me to answer except me. Dingbat!!! Okay then, any subject matter expert out there?When was the last time, you went out with your friends, and you know there is one dying to come out from you. You try to suppress it. Huh? How do you supress gas to come out? That I have to really know. Anyone? Anyway, you just pray that it will not smell and it will be quiet. Suddenly, it went out without any frills. Success!! You heaved a sigh of relief and you smile. Stupid! Why did you smile? Now your friends will want to know what made you smile. Quick! Think of something good to say to satisfy them. What will you do? Be honest or tell a very good story? How about the time, you were in church, and all of a sudden, there was a potent smell around you? You were hoping that the people around you will be so engrossed with their prayers that they will not know. Are you kidding me? The smell was so rotten, who would not miss it? Okay, okay. But are you not glad you are not near the altar or the priest might pause to put his fingers on his nose and forget what he is saying? Then everybody will be looking at you with an evil eye for interrupting the service! Ha! Ha! Ha! This is a joke, I do not think passing out gas can be that brutal.The best time to pass it is when you are alone, no one to smell, like a skunk, except you, and no one to hear except you. Sometimes the sound can be heard all the way outside of your house, like a train!! Have you ever been in tha bathtub, taking a bath? All of a sudden, you see bubbles coming out. That is so neat!! You are not even blowing bubbles!! Is this crazy or what? Did you know that even if you are sleeping, gas comes out? I did not think it is possible, but it is true. That is soo weird. What is weird about that? This is just snoring frm your behind!!!Even as crazy as it sounds, there is a couple that invented undies that will prevent the smell to come out. They tried to get financial backing, but there are no takers. I think that is nice they invented it because sometimes you are in bed and here it comes, one after another. And if smell can kill, you could die at that time. Thank you and more laughter to you all. Keep smiling!!!!!
Posted by vs at 2/23/2010 10:33 AM Add Comment